Well played Microsoft, well played.

"Taylor Hedgie" (TaylorHedgie) 07/07/2015 at 17:24 • Filed to: Because Racecar Xbone

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They found my weakspot after having what I’m sure was undercover agents watching my every move as I decide on which game console to buy and suddenly...

An Xbox One that makes god damn racecar and air wrench sounds is debuted, and topped off with Forza tom-foolery all about it.

Alright alright, shit-la-wit I’ll buy your damn low-end gaming PC—- I mean console.

(I am way too giddy over the bell and whistles of this thing for my age. Then again, I’m 24, browse Jalopnik/lurk Oppositelock, and dabble in internet mud-slinging arguments debates over most things concerning motorsports.

*Edit: Kudos to whoever saw fit to have the rainbow Oppo logo featured. Haha

Nibbles > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 17:30

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For your age? Shit, son, when I saw this thing I showed it to the wife, grinned and said “buying it. Try to stop me”

I’m 32 going on 12

StingrayJake > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 17:30

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For your age? At 24? Stop. Get out of here. Get out of here right now. I’m 27 and the whole gaming-while-married thing is a back-and-forth battle every day. I don’t want to hear about your too-old-for-this nonsense. We are not too old for this.

deekster_caddy > Nibbles 07/07/2015 at 17:34

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For your age? Shit, son. I can’t play GTAV in the house. Wife says it’s not good for the kids or something. I’m 43 going on 19. Shit. :(

Anyone want GTAV for the XB360?

Nibbles > deekster_caddy 07/07/2015 at 17:36

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Now that just ain’t right

can you play it in the garage?

Taylor Hedgie > Nibbles 07/07/2015 at 17:37

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Well I uh...

Might have yelled “MOM COME HERE AND LOOK WHAT I’M GONNA GET, IT MAKES CAR SOUNDS.”

Step Brothers-level excitement.

Almost reminds me of this Hot Wheels thing I had way back when. We must tread carefully, M$ now knows how to take our monies:

PC or Apple? Surprise bitch the Windows start up screen now makes revving noises.

What a time to be alive.

Taylor Hedgie > StingrayJake 07/07/2015 at 17:38

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You know what you all are right, I’m going to play my video games with the 7.1 surround sound I paid too much for turned on, with the subwoofer level set to POWERFUL.

The revolution has begun!

Mercedes Streeter > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 17:42

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According to my doctor, my magic hormone pills are putting me through puberty again. Soooo...I’m not 22, I’m 12 dammit!!! Pretty colours! Glitter! Noises!

Taylor Hedgie > Mercedes Streeter 07/07/2015 at 17:49

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“Mom this thing will make ME money in the future, it’s gonna be worth so much money oh man, limited EDITION. NO ONE TOUCHES IT EXCEPT ME.”

Takuro Spirit > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 17:56

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I’m 35 and I just got a Xbone. Thought I was done with gaming too, after I sold my 360 and all my fun stuff to pay for Trans Am parts.... my wife thought different and her and her family got me one for Father’s Day last month.

Taylor Hedgie > Takuro Spirit 07/07/2015 at 18:00

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That’s an M.Night.Shamalan worthy plot twist right there.

Or maybe they are trying to keep you from your Trans Am by providing you with video games.

I smell a conspiracy.

CaptDale - is secretly British > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 18:33

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I think I might go try to blow out my tv speaker with engine noise after work today

Taylor Hedgie > CaptDale - is secretly British 07/07/2015 at 18:40

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Be sure to adjust the audio settings to focus on Car noise, I’ve found that doing so in FM4 the Mazda 787B can actually rattle the floor if I have it turned loud enough.

71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 19:03

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Link to where to buy one

Taylor Hedgie > 71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors 07/07/2015 at 19:05

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I -do- believe it’s actually available for pre-order on the 360’s dashboard, on the Home page too.

CaptDale - is secretly British > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 19:08

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I actually have music off and car noise 100%. I fucking hate in game music. Its usually terrible and distracting.

71MGBGT Likes Subarus of Unusual Colors > Taylor Hedgie 07/07/2015 at 19:14

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Found it, thanks

Taylor Hedgie > CaptDale - is secretly British 07/07/2015 at 19:19

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Same here, I’ve never understood having some fast-paced elevator-esqe techno playing only to just have it drown out the car’s revs.

Every now and then I’ll switch it over to Tire-focused if it’s a race that’ll require a pit stop or something, but otherwise it’s all engine noise.

deekster_caddy > Nibbles 07/07/2015 at 20:00

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Ooh that’s a good idea!